i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Randomize
