FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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