i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
