And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Randomize
