Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
