Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
