He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
