is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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