OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
