So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
