doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
