I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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