he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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