It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
