and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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