you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
