I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
