So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
