He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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