so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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