I don't remember. Are we still dating?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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