I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
