so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
please don't ironically join a cult
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