If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
