if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
