I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
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