what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
