Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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