My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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