Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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