Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
no more duck duck goose at the bar
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
