You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
