Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
