Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
