just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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