I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
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