I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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