is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
