I wannas sexs uuuuu
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
