We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
