Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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