I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Will exercising make me less horny?
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