belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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