Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
No subtext here. People are naked.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
