Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
