i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize