Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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