I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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