you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
