Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
